
Shearsman
53 |
Rupert
M. Loydell
The
Architecture of Memory |
'There
are exactly the same things in a room at night
as there are in the day time; it's just that you can't see them'
- Arturo Pérez-Reverte, The Flanders Panel
What is a man supposed to do?
I think that faith is strong in me
but it is not especially useful
for getting from one place to another.
I favour conjecture and counterpoint,
am opposed to clearly defined structures.
There are no answers to most questions,
no such thing as being sure.
If I am ever in a state of total conviction,
attempting to embrace conclusions,
please remind me only gestures exist.
How fragile and short-lived the truth is.
*
I imagine I can spot
doubt a mile off:
curved surfaces with undue distortions.
I really do hate writing poems,
swing between words like a confused needle.
Why do some of us love nothing
so much as complex nothingness?
Poetry is a simple instrument
that breaks the continuous flow,
part of a carefully constructed system
of abstract symbols. Doubt and distrust
seem just as true; interpretative biases
are inevitable. What lies we tell.
*
Writing itself is a process of discovery.
It can be read as marks printed on paper
or heard as long and short notes.
There are ways of using repetition.
The syntax and grammar of a spoken tongue
propels the reader through the landscape
by seductive whispering in the ear.
There are ways of using repetition.
I posit a world beyond measurement.
We are a wonderful paradox
whose meaning escapes interpretation.
There are ways of using repetition.
*
Experience and quotation intersect.
Whatever attentive reader
might loose the lightning,
I acknowledge my debts right now.
We are discussing the individual words,
cannot crack the code; the pictograph
is the substance of communication,
phantom pain after the loss of a limb.
We can be moved by the memory:
birds and women conjoined in stone,
swollen symbols of fertility,
paired beneath blessing hands.
*
Mystical vocabulary brings
propensity for astonishment.
Time seems to run out
with nagging persistence.
Voyages into abstraction
must be documented:
plot the position of
these nameless countries;
make the mute articulate;
sort out music from the sound.
I want to insist on experience,
call this state of being wonder.
*
I sometimes never know
which part of my poem is yours.
The whole mix of self & search
arrives over forgotten airwaves.
I could make these four-line stanzas
quirky, irregular and sensuously inert,
send jargon to landfill and recontextualise.
The urinal might become a fountain.
Signs have a history of changing meaning:
in old maps the compass points
were often referred to as winds.
I may be charged but I ain't moved.
*
I am not part of the circle
although every game I ever played
stressed the loop, the elaborate
meandering of imagination.
I sense you aren't entirely sure:
the shadow as well as the silhouette
must be dealt with, there should be
at least a faint tremor of sense.
Observe, interpret and experience.
Notice the faded disturbance of darkness,
the unforeseen movement of light.
Language is the only thing in the world.
Copyright
© Rupert M. Loydell, 2002
Rupert
Loydell
runs the Exeter small press, Stride
and its associated webzine.
His latest collection appears shortly from Arc. He is also a painter,
specialising in abstracts. Some examples of this work can be found
at the Stride magazine site. |

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